In this video, Vivek Murthy discusses the commonality of loneliness and its impact on our sense of self. He emphasizes the importance of understanding and compassion towards ourselves and others who may be experiencing loneliness, and the power of connection in healing the pain of loneliness.

Loneliness is extraordinarily common. It is part of the human experience. If you are lonely, if you've been lonely, you are not alone. It also doesn't mean that you are broken in any way. In fact, we've learned that loneliness is a natural signal, like hunger or thirst, that our body sends us when we lack something that we need for our survival, which is social connections. If you want to understand why that is, it has to do with how we evolved as human beings thousands and thousands of years ago. We were beings who really needed connection to others to ensure safety, to ensure we had an adequate food supply. When we were together, taking turns watching for predators, when we were sharing our food supply, we did better together. So, there is no shame in feeling lonely, even though society often tells us that we've done something wrong. Or, if we somehow find ourselves alone on a Friday night, or if we feel lonely on the playground, or in the cafeteria at school. Perhaps most insidious, but most harmful, is the impact loneliness has on our sense of self. Over time, we come to believe when we're lonely that we're lonely because we're not likable. This makes it harder to take a risk and a chance in conversation. So in that way, loneliness can be a downward spiral. Part of the challenge and the mission to build a more connected society and a more connected life is figuring out how do we break that downward spiral. So that we can, once again, rebuild connection, which is what we're naturally called to do. I think when we understand how common loneliness is, it gives us an opportunity to be compassionate with ourselves. But also to look at others and to recognize that they may too be experiencing loneliness. Here's what is tricky about loneliness. It doesn't look like a person sitting alone in the corner of a room at a party. Loneliness can manifest as anger and irritability. It can look like withdrawal from others. For some people, they become more stoic and less expressive when they're lonely. Loneliness can look like many different things. If we look around us, we probably know people who are angry and irritable. And now I ask myself often in those scenarios, is there loneliness behind that curtain, if you will? My hope is that we can respond to that with forgiveness, with compassion, with a sense of a deeper understanding that we are, in fact, more deeply tied to one another by this experience of loneliness. But the last point to remember here is that also gives us a special power, the power to help heal the pain of loneliness in each other's lives. What we need to be able to do is simply show up with our full selves, ready to listen, ready to understand, ready to be there for them, even if it's just for a few moments. When you listen to someone else, you're not just hearing the words that they're saying, you are sending them a message that they matter, that you see them, they have value. And that's one of the most powerful messages you can send to another human being.